Nina Simone - I Get Along Without You Very Well, Lobster   (DL)

Lobster Hunt: Day 6

It turns out that the hookstick I so brilliantly re-invented is fucking impossible to use. That anyone catches anything with this thing is incredible to me. It’s amazing that something so simple could be so infuriating.

Anyway, after two days of molesting lobsters with an oversized fishing hook strapped to a broom handle, and with only two days remaining in my catch-a-lobster-or-get-butt-naked-on-the-internet challenge, I broke down and bought a speargun. Spearfishing turns out to be a LOT of fun, and the only thing that detracts from that fun is the certain inevitability that I’m going to accidentally shoot myself with a speargun. This is probably a good time to tell me family and friends that I love them, and that assuming there is a heaven (which there isn’t), and that they accept people into heaven who delight in shooting spears through other living things (which seems unlikely), I will be waiting for them in heaven. I’ll be waiting next to the big white fountain, so let’s plan on meeting up there.

Above is a page from my Reef Identification Book. Keep in mind as you read this page that I miiiiiight have a bit of a shark thing. And it’s not like they’re not around, because I see them almost every day.